Marriage Counseling

As a Marriage and Family Therapist, I work with Couples to relate to and understand their partners.
Watch my videos by clicking on the links below.

"Real love is a permanently self-enlarging experience." - M. Scott Peck

Hope for Hurting Marriages

Hello, my name is John Boesky and I am a San Diego marriage therapist.  I have been a marriage counselor in San Diego for many years with a private practice in Kensington, San Diego.

One of the most difficult things to do is to acknowledge a problem and to seek out a solution to that problem. To compound it even more, something as private and delicate a situation as a marriage problem, makes it even more difficult for one to seek out help. But through my years of experience in working with couples I have learned that those that are seeking for a way to save and reconcile a marriage and are courageous enough to seek help are the ones who have the best chance  for success in saving their marriage.
What I try to accomplish as a marriage therapist is to work  closely with both parties, husband and wife.  Not taking any sides, not trying to find who is at fault or to blame, but rather, finding out what the issues are that are causing the conflicts and addressing those issues immediately, without assigning blame or an antagonist.

This approach allows the couple to start the road to reconciliation and the end to any animosity.
Another thing I try to do is help the couples relate and understand who the other person is, and in a setting with a marriage counselor, it allows us to approach this area without any tension.
All the while, this approach in couples counseling  is setting the foundation for what I know is the key to any healthy marriage and relationship, and that is effective communication and effective listening.
In essence, all communication is based on listening, and using a technique called Active Listening, allows true communication to begin.
Once couples truly hear (listen) each other, they are then better able to communicate more effectively and eliminating most causes of conflicts.
My approach is really based upon an integrative approach that draws upon a cognitive, behavioral, psychodynamic,
Object Relations, Jungian, Bowen Family systems, and experiential therapies.

But please don't let the long titles of techniques put you off or scare you.  It all boils down to the fact that I find it an honor and a privilege to serve my clients.  I love the process of helping couples transform and change their current marriage relationships, and the techniques mentioned above are just a means to the end.  The end being a successful and happy marriage.
Please don't hesitate to contact me at my office immediately.  If you think your marriage is in trouble, do not wait. Seek professional counseling.

All couples experience conflict in their marriages, but the happy couples are the ones who know how to handle disagreements based upon a foundation of affection and friendship.  Let me help you get that foundation.